Space Quest[]
- This isn't Space Quest IV, Bonds. You can only go down the drain professionally in this game.
- Nice plants. You remember that plants are supposed to clean up the atmosphere. You briefly wish they'd help clean up the neighborhood... No, Bonds. No carnivorous plants. Play Space Quest II for that.
Quest for Glory[]
This ain't Quest for Glory, Bonds. It's never gonna fly.
Conquests of the Longbow[]
On closer inspection, you discover the words "Robin of Locksley was here" carved into the wood. Damn vandals.
Leisure Suit Larry[]
- Paul looks like the kind of guy built to wear leisure suits and spend his life in cheesy discos. His orange tan suggests an unfortunate go-round with a tube of Instant-Tan. All he needs are a few gold chains and a bottle of breath spray.
Computer games[]
- You're a policeman. You don't have time to play computer games.
- The poster is an advertisement for "Naugahyde Goddesses of Oakhurst, Part VII, The Absolutely Final Chapter, No, Seriously, We Mean it This Time. It's the story of three young, nubile computer programmers with a thing for leather on their own in the big city. Will corruption, sleaze and cheap hardware destroy them? Will they find true love? Will they get good jobs at a computer game company and live happily ever after...or will they sink into the pit of arcade depravity?